Special Valentines Episode: Love and Relationships

Hey guys, welcome to Learn Feng Shui, where you'll learn Feng Shui from a classical point of view taken out the myths and superstition. If you like weekly tips as well as fun folklore tales, you'll enjoy learning Feng Shui with me. Hey guys, let's talk about Feng Shui for love. Really think that looking at relationships is going to be a big aspect of the theme for the entire year. So just kind of looking at the connotation.

We have this rabbit energy that is coming in. And of course, I mean we know what, what the rabbit symbolizes throughout different cultures. It's like a side of fertility and romance and all this spring and renewal and I mean literally reproducing right. Those that's a symbolism that comes to mind when we think of the bunny rabbit. And I mean it's the same thing.

We have this rabbit that's coming in for the year. So we have this year of the rabbit. And it's a very romantic type of energy that's coming in this year. It's almost like these flower, this flowering energy. You know, a very dominant for this year.

And then even the connotation with the Feng Shui and flying star number four being what is quote unquote the romance star in the center of the the low shoe for the year. And so remember that really does set the tone. And so I really, I think I'm going to be focusing a little bit more on how that's affecting our relationships this year and how we can really enhance that. And especially for this month of February when you know here, of course in some way, we're going to be focusing on the next year. Countries, we celebrate Valentine's Day.

And so looking at the love and relationship aspect through the lens of Chinese metaphysics, there's some different energies we can kind of look at. But remember it's not just about Feng Shui. And so if we only concentrate on the Feng Shui aspect of, you know, enhancing the love and relationship, we're only enhancing what our environment is literally Feng Shui is the study and of, you know, energy within our environment. And so we have to address a few different things. And to do that, we also have to look at our personal energy and the way we actually react to that.

And for that, I'm going to start off with looking at love and relationships through what is called the cosmic trinity. And so you may have been aware of this concept or may have heard the term heaven earth and man. And it said when the three combined, that's when you get the best results. And so let's take a look at which each aspect of heaven earth and man mean. The first aspect I want to look at is heaven.

So when we're looking at a head heaven energy and turns a lot on relationships, one of the biggest things that I look at is timing for somebody. And so I tend to get a lot of times like, you know, when can I meet someone window, I have the opportunity to get married. And really that's looking at this heaven energy because we're looking at the energy. And so we're looking at the energy of our needle charts energy that is given to us on the day we're born, you know, that's kind of that heaven energy. But also have an energy can be that timing energy.

And so when we look, you know, it might not be a quote unquote good year for you or you might not have like the energy that might bring it a spouse for the entire year. But you know what? Like we'll through and you're going to have it at least, you know, a couple times during the year, you'll have some months that come in that can support you meetings and body and finding relationships. So just looking at things like timing and our own energy, we're able to kind of look and say like, okay, if we do these things then the opportunity could present itself. And that's the heaven energy.

So looking into the man aspect of things will get to the earth here in just a minute, but the man aspect really is your choices and your actions. And so when we look at the man aspect of things, particularly if you are one that says that you have had the same type of relationships over and over or you've tend to run into the same type of person over and over again. There's something within you or something maybe an action you're doing that is attracting that type of person. So you have to really look at the common denominator and all the relationships which really is yourself. So if there's issues where you tend to date the same type of person and they're not right for you, that it really is an issue where we can have to do some inner self work and knowing that you're worthy of something really good.

You're really are worthy of that relationship. And so instead of settling and thinking and falling into those same patterns, we really need to work on the self love and self awareness and those actions we're taking so you can improve your future relationships. So when I started learning different methods of Chinese metaphysics, I would kind of throw it out there in my social media and stuff like, hey, if you want to read it or if you want some insight today, let me know and I'll answer a question for you. And I'll never forget I did have someone ask me about relationships. And when I told them, hey, let me see your new, you know, what's your birthday?

Let me see your natal chart if you don't mind. And I mean, they were all for it. But when I when I looked through, you know, looking through that personal information through your birthday and getting an idea of what kind of energy is within you and kind of looking at those tendencies we have, you know, I gave, I gave them some advice. I told them, hey, I honestly can't remember what I told them, but I do remember giving them advice. And it was really a lot of the self love and inner work that I felt like this person needed to do because of their, their energy, you know, it's definitely was a little bit of lack of self awareness on their part.

And when I let them know they were just like, oh, I just wanted some fun show tips or some fun show advice. And so they literally just wanted me to tell them, like, you know, do this and you'll find love. And so again, it doesn't really work that way. There's a lot of aspects that kind of need to fall into place and just looking at the energy that we're working with and looking at those things, it really does come to a place of self awareness. Maybe we need some self love.

That would be you can know that you are worthy of having a good relationship and finding a good relationship or fixing your relationships, you know, that you have now. So again, it's there's a lot more to it than just placing out items. There's many parts to it that kind of need to connect like a puzzle piece. And when those, the mindset is there, you know, the inner work is done, then we're able to adjust the function in our environment and call and attract that in. So if you are into anything metaphysical, which if you're listening to this podcast, you probably are, I mean, there's a ton of things you can do, a ton of like new age type self help people will tell you, you know, Tony Robbins of Bob Proctor and a Wayne Dyer, like they all tell you be prepared.

So one of the things you can do in your specifically if you want to change your environment a little bit, it really is to get yourself in the mindset of like, I mean, I'm going to do that. So mindset of like, oh, when I attract that partner, when I attract that partner, not if, but when, you know, when that happens. So literally start getting yourself prepared, like doing things like cleaning out and closet space for that person or parking on the other side of the driveway, you know, moving to the other side of your bed or clearing off the space in your room to be ready. You know, it's like a participation and preparedness thing and that's one of the most powerful things I think that we can do. So even though we can adjust our environment, we can do function activations, we can get that mindset ready, really being prepared and being excited and ready for what is next and really calling that in and setting that attention.

It is important. So now to the good stuff, the stuff the podcast is named after the Learn Feng Shui showy stuff is looking at the fun showy aspect of relationships. There's definitely things we can do in our environment that can enhance our relationships or attract a new partner. So when I'm looking at classical fun showy, which is what I tend to lean towards when when I myself am helping somebody or eating somebody in, you know, finding a partner or enhancing their relationship. The biggest thing we look at is bed placement.

So specific bed placement can be done for couples and specific bed placement can be done if you are a single. So it just kind of depends on, you know, what we're working with, right. But again, kind of going back and referring back, your personal energy does come into account with bed placement. So yeah, bed placement is a very large one in receiving a good energy. Another thing that can be done with a single person, especially in the bedroom is placing plants.

So plants can be placed in a very specific sector or area to trigger energy that is associated with that sector for the year. So we may have you place a plants in a very specific location within your bedroom because of course your bedroom represents your relationships. And this is done with date and time selection, both bed placement and a placing plants and specific areas. And one thing I want to add is that it is paired with action. So I tend to get a lot of people saying like they don't really feel like, you know, getting out there meeting somebody or they don't want to get on those dating apps.

And, you know, that's okay. But, you know, maybe you can have your friends set you up with somebody or go out with a mutual friend, you know, go on some group dates and see if anyone, you know, clicks with these and friend dates. So kind of look at it some different ways, but remember kind of going back to, you know, the heaven or the man, man also represents action. So we have to have that action in there to then, you know, also trigger and support the energy of meeting someone. So remember it's I think it's so funny that I've heard before other function practitioners say, you know, they're just waiting some people are waiting for someone to break into their house to fall in love with them, right.

So you can't meet somebody if you don't get out there and put yourself out there. So remember unless you're going to fall in love with your delivery drivers, right. Then I mean, I suppose that's a possibility to. But yeah, put the action into it also. So if you are one that links more towards BTP function way or Western style, Baga, you can definitely add items to these love and relationship sectors that are designated for the style you practice.

So if you again do BTP, if you walk in, you're going to locate the nearest corner to your left and that is your love relationship sector. And if we're practicing Western style, Feng Shui, that designates life areas, of course, you're going to locate the Southwest sector and that is your obviously love and relationship sector. So if you're single, obviously placing items in pairs is really one that electric practitioners will recommend placing bases of flowers and you can definitely add decorative touches to these flowers and use symbolism in the type of flower that you choose to put there. So I know we've talked about different types of flowers or birds of paradise. There's peonies, there's plum cherry and peach blossoms.

You can add to the area and just kind of going through and looking at the symbolism and deciding what you kind of want to attract. You can choose what kind of flowers you display in the area. And remember, you can also get decorative and bring in different elements by using, of course, like shapes and colors and stuff like that. Remember, really romantic and warm soft peachy earthy tones are kind of used in this area to enhance it. And of course, you can use things square, and stuff like that for dissemblies, or you can add different decorative touches.

Of course, if you literally think of a vase of flowers, it's this earth containing water. And there's of course wood inside of there, represented by the flowers. So you can really be creative and decorative in which items and type of things you choose to place out to enhance if you like to place items out. So another area you can enhance if just in general, whichever style of lunch where you practice, is your bedroom. Remember your bedroom.

It does represent that romance and that relationship. It's supposed to enhance that part of you that intimate side. And so when we're looking at that, of course, you want to do different things whether you're married or if you're single. So obviously if you're married, you want to enhance a relationship you already have. And I see a different bunch of different things.

Of course, this is more on the design side, but it said that you should only place pictures of you in your spouse and your bedroom because that's a very special place to you guys as for your intimate. And so with that note, keep like deities and keep pictures of other family members and all that out of your room because again, sometimes I've heard that it invites other people into being nosy in your relationship. And we definitely don't want that. Of course, deities are best saved for ultra placement. We don't want to offend them.

You know, in our bedroom activity. So we don't want to do that. And so, yeah, just pictures of you in your spouse if you're married and enhance it that way, you know, make it a very soft, romantic place. Keep it clean and decluttered. No matter if you're single or not, you don't want clutter on the side of your bed, especially on the right side of your bed because it represents the feminine.

If you are single, you get there again, there's areas you can put flowers and plants in your bedroom that is believed to also enhance the love life. But again, sometimes it can enhance a little bit too much. Once we place those flowers down and all that, once you've attracted a partner, if you're single, then those flowers or the plant is taken out and the energy is suppressed by, usually it's a little bit of a secret, but we can suppress the energy. And actually, same if you're married too. If you're married and your partner is having a little romance without you, there's also ways to suppress that.

But you didn't hear that from me. So I do actually have a free download that you could go right to my website and download. It does come straight up as you, you know, log in or you go visit the website. It'll pop straight up. It's a little pop up box for you.

But if you go to the website and that does not pop up, I will put a direct link in the show notes and you can just download that free guy. And it really kind of talks about everything I talked about today. I was in this people when I do relationship work for them, but really kind of connecting that heaven, earth and man and connecting that intention, doing, you know, the self love and then enhancing with Feng Shui really come together to make it pretty effective. I did an episode on this last year, but I think also looking very importantly at the progression of relationships through the lens of Chinese metaphysics can be quite useful. So I talked about this last year on another episode.

I might link to it because I talk about more in depth. And this is not for me. It the source is from Kevin Chan who does Feng Shui. He has a YouTube channel where he does Facebook lives all the time. So this is not my information.

I'm simply relating what he said. So he talked about the natural flow and progression of a relationship. He's he talked about the elements of Feng Shui, the elements of Chinese metaphysics, which are water, earth, fire, wood and metal. And he kind of related them to a flow. And so he stated that the flow starts with water.

And so water is that initial interest or your meeting somebody and connecting with them. And so step one is meeting and connecting step two is really it's so water feeds into wood. So wood really is about knowledge learning and kind of growing, you know, so kind of growing that relationship. And you know, you don't want to skip any of these steps right. So wood it feels fire.

And so fire it represents that passion and that, you know, the, of course, the lust that we can feel for the person, you know, you can take that to the next level with the person and be more passionate with them. So that passion inevitably can lead to creating so fire creates earth. So earth represents a stability and making that, you know, that that stable relationship. It is about, you know, nurturing and things like that. So even though you have that passion, you still need to nurture and grow the relationship a little bit and cultivate it, which is of course represented by the element of earth.

So earth will create metal. And so metal, it's about decision making. So then you will make this decision to get married, you'll make decision to take things to the next step. And then of course metal feeds back into water and that can be the creation of a family. So there has to be this natural progression and flow.

And if there's not a natural progression and flow, you may tend to miss out on some of these steps. If you, if you happen to be missing, remember our chart is not just about our animal science. It has these different elements that all interact with each other. And so if you're missing one of these elements where you have a low element, you may tend to jump to the next step. And so I would kind of think about that and think about that natural progression and flow to a relationship.

Also before trying to jump into the marriage part of it. One thing that I'll also add is that I notice when somebody is missing an element in their natal chart, it inevitably leads them to miss one of these steps. It's almost like maybe you're not aware that you're completely missing this type of energy from your, your natal chart or your just your personal energy. And so, so for example, if a person has, you know, the element of water, a lot of element of water, maybe they, you know, are good at like meeting people. But if you don't have the element of wood, perhaps you are not getting to know the person before, then trying to dive into the, you know, the fire, the passion and diving into the commitment.

And so sometimes you tend to go straight from getting to know somebody or you skip a step in there if that makes sense. So if you are, you know, don't have a lot of earth, maybe you skip the commitment part if you don't have a lot of fire, maybe you're not interested in a lot of passionate, you know, or getting to know somebody passionately, or maybe you want to get to know them as friends first. And I think that's okay. But the point is looking at these elements within our natal chart can tell us a lot about the way that we also relate to relationships. Let's take a quick sponsor break and we come back.

I wanted to cover something a little different for this love and relationship valentine episode. Today we're going to talk about Chinese ghost marriages. Alright, so Chinese ghost marriages. So where else would this information come from other than Taoist or sorcery master dot blog spot dot calm. So he did change the name.

You should just be Taoist or sorcery dot blog spot. Now Taoist or sorcery master dot blog spot. Of course, I will link in the show. So Chinese ghost marriages and why it is done. Ghost marriage is also known as post humus marriage or negromancy.

So Chinese ghost marriage is also known as bone matching in marriage ghost marriage or spirit marriage. And it is a Chinese folk tradition. And it means that either a living person can marry a deceased person or two deceased people can get married and does state that the ghost marriage is sometimes our practice in South Korea. So getting into ghost marriages. I guess it was a pretty popular practice in ancient China.

I'm going to keep reading. I haven't read the whole thing. So we'll see if it's still practice today. But it doesn't say here. There's many records of ghost marriages in ancient Chinese texts.

And there's a couple of popular ones stating that I guess it was probably an emperor or something. It said his son died at the age of 13 and out of love for his son. He patrols the deceased woman. To his son and then they were buried together. And from the ancient book, dream records of yesterday written in the southern song period.

It was written that families of deceased individuals of eligible age would seek help from ghost matchmakers. If the deceased couples were found to be matchable, they would proceed with the ceremony of a ghost marriage. So why would this be done? It says why seek ghost marriage ceremony or a ritual. So it does state here that in the past, it was believed that if there was a lonely grave in the ancestral grave, that it would affect the prosperity of future generations.

And it was unlucky. So it was necessary to hold a marriage for that deceased individual had they been of age, such as the 13 year old young man. Here it says living person seeking ghost rituals. So sometimes this can be done again with a one living person, marrying a person that has passed away already. It says human life is unpredictable.

And one person is alive. And the next second, of course, they can be gone. So when a steady couple has planned to get married, but suddenly passed away due to accident or illness, the living person hopes to complete the marriage as to also be forever. Forever remembered in his or her heart. And they will then seek a ghost marriage ceremony.

And it says here is occasionally still practice. If a Chinese man has double wives from multi wives, look in his destiny or his bossa, usually parents and even the wife agrees to have the husband do a ghost marriage with the deceased or several deceased women. And this will help maintain the living wife to be the only wife in the man's life. The first deceased woman to be married will be considered wife number one. And the second wife that is deceased will be wife number two and so on and so forth.

The living wife will always be denoted as the very last wife. And so if just kind of a little aside, if you're looking at somebody's needle chart or their bossa chart, sometimes you can see whether they'll be married multiple times. And apparently what this is doing is it's taking that away because you're already married to multiple people in the ghostly realm. And then you just then have one wife here on earth. So yeah, guess you get it.

Ghostly sister wives. Another reason a ghost marriage might be done is because they need the deceased person to have a space on the ancestor tablet on the altar. And so let's see if I can explain this. I'll just read here. It says a deceased married Chinese woman's tablet is kept the altar for her husband's family.

However, if a woman of eligible age for marriage passes away and she is not married, her family is prohibited from placing her tablet on the altar of her natal home. She is given a temporary paper tablet and it is placed not on the traditional domestic altar, but it's in a corner near the front door. And it says hence the important duty of Chinese parents marrying off their children becomes increasingly important for their daughters. This proved, especially during the old days, not sure how much it proves to any more, but it says here since women are only able to acquire the membership and a descent line through marriage. The ghost marriage becomes a viable solution to ensure that an unmarried deceased daughter still has an affiliation to a male descent line.

And it would properly be cared for after death. And so I do again, I'm not Taoist. So I don't know 100% but what I've heard is that they have. They have ancestor tablets if you are like Taoist and I think maybe a Buddhist do it too, but you have an ancestor tablet with the names of your deceased ancestors. And generally, of course, we know that traditionally a male would inherit a course they inherit the name and money and whatnot.

So, all right, daughters were never eligible to inherit and they had to inherit through marriage. So again, this kind of has to do with that old tradition. And the tradition of the tablet is that when you have this ancestor tablet that when one passes away, that your in spirit, it remains with your remains or your ashes or you know, it's in your burial tomb right when your burial grave. But the Yang part and the living part stays on this ancestor tablet. And so not sure I get too many of the implications of this.

So if you practice this or not this, but the ancestor tablets. And you have some more information, please email me and let me know. So here it says, if you're in Taiwan, do not pick up one of those red envelopes that they used to put money in for Chinese New Year called an Angpang, if you find one on the floor. So if you think that you, you know, maybe we'll stumble across some money inside the envelope or something, a lot of times, these are actually way to trap you into marrying somebody's deceased daughter. So here it says, the parents of a deceased unwed daughter wanting to marry her off to a living man will put some money in an envelope.

They'll put the daughter's hair and they will put the bots a date or their birth date or in particular, an information inside this red envelope. And they'll leave it on the floor waiting to see who picks it up. And if a man picks it up, it says the parents will appear from their hiding and come and welcome you to be their bridegroom or the husband for the ghost marriage proposal. So you will be given a certain amount of wealth and benefits it says, but you can't actually run away from the marriage. It says you're pretty much committed if you pick up that envelope.

So if you turn down the ghost marriage proposal, the ghost of the deceased daughter will haunt you and create havoc in your life. So you better do that ghost marriage. In some desperate cases, some families are afraid that no one would pick up the packet. They would simply randomly attach the red packet onto a scooter or motorbike. And they would, you know, it feels, they would, I guess, see if it would be owned by a man.

And so then they would kind of rope them in that way. Another reason one might perform a ghost marriage here. It says that younger brothers are not supposed to marry before the elder brother. And therefore a ghost marriage could be performed for the older brother. The deceased brother may also be arranged before the younger brother's wedding to avoid incurring disfavor of the brother's ghost.

So I guess this will be done if either the brother is not married or if the brother had passed away before he got married and he was the elder. So sometimes the ghost actually seeks out this marriage. And this is done by a little bit of good old fashioned haunting. It says that a ghost might happen to like a particular living person. So the ghost will send hints to the living person through dreams or creating paranormal activity.

The living person makes all the spirit medium in the temple and be told about the issue. And sometimes the male or female ghost was asking for marriage ritual with another ghost. So that's pretty interesting here. It says when a loving student to be married couple happened to die together that they will usually hint to the living parents through dreams that they want a ghost marriage ritual. So it does say here of course it brings to mind some movies like the movie Ghost and Demi Moore, Patrick Swayze, a good classic where the dead and the living can still interact with each other through whether a medium or some ghostly events.

Even the Tim Burton movie The Corpse Bride of course comes to mind where the The Corpse Bride comes up to be with Victor you know. And of course a movie that's not so romantic but is again about obsession and wanting the dead one in the live person to be with them is the movie shutter. If you've never seen the movie shutter, I highly suggest it. It's pretty creepy. So I will warn you about going to Grey Yards 2 and it says here that beware what you say because a real ghost story actually happened in Singapore.

So it says a man happened to pass by a graveyard and he spotted a photo of a face of a deceased girl on a tombstone and he said what a beautiful girl if she was alive I would take her to be my wife. Well the ghost heard this and stuck to him every since and one day he was riding his motorbike on the road on the opposite flow of traffic and it says here ghost covering his eyes. So he was actually hit by a car and passed away and the deceased man's dad felt suspicious because he was never he was an alcoholic never took drugs so he was not be under the influence of anything. He decided to consult a spirit medium in the temple near his home and the deity told him that the female ghost fell in love with his son and wanted him to be her husband and took him away to be with her due to what his son said at her grave and a ghost reading, so I will download that love and relationship guide and I will catch you guys on the next episode which will probably be March Energy Update. For free energy mapping of your floor plan please check the link in the show notes.

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